Daily Meditation: Results

Hello to everyone still reading! :) My weeks of trying daily meditation went pretty well. I skipped a few days for various reasons (I didn't have internet or computer access, I wasn't staying at home, etc.) but of the days I did try it I felt like it worked pretty well in just helping me refocus a bit and get back on track. The C.D. I had was a little harder because there was a booklet to go with it that I didn't have access to, so I felt like I couldn't do a lot of what she was asking. I would love to get a C.D. of my own that can guide me through a quick meditation (I'm thinking like 10 minutes max- I definitely don't have the attention span for much more) and can teach me how to do it on my own, so that I can still practice something like this even when I don't have access to a computer or what not.  I honestly feel like a lot of the reason it worked even when I used lame little 3 minute inspirational videos on youtube was just because I felt like I was doing something to try to help myself. I was sitting still for a minute and trying to wade through all the crapp that was in my head to just focus on who I am at the center of myself. If anyone has good suggestions for C.D.'s or whatever that I could get to help me continue this I would love that!!
Even though I felt like the meditation worked well when I was doing it, I kind of fell off the bandwagon after the required two week commitment I had set to myself. I've had a bit of a rough time over this past week, and I'm not sure why. Some of it I think is probably not taking that time to myself to try to get through the "stuff" and center in on who I am and why I'm worthwhile. I came to a realization recently that when I'm focusing on why I'm worthwhile or why I'm worthy of love I almost always focus on what I can give to other people. For example I say to myself "I'm worth being loved because I give so much to those around me, I love them, I try to give them everything I can, I want to make them happy, etc." What I have realized is that I need to understand that I'm worthy of being loved and of loving myself just because I am me. I am a human on this earth. Any baby who is born is automatically worthy of being loved and nurtured, and likewise just because I am a person with a soul and I am worthy of loving and nurturing myself. This is a really hard thing for me to accept. I can't see what use I am without what I can give to people. Perhaps that is why when my relationships change I struggle so much. What the other person is getting from me changes and for some reason when that change happens I no longer see what worth I am to them, or what worth I am to myself because I'm not giving the people I love as much as I used to or as much as I want to. Does that make any sense? Has anyone out there struggled with anything similar? How have you guys dealt with it?
I'd love to hear any input any of you guys have!
I recently came across these two quotes and I think they both kind of capture the journey I am on right now in my life. I feel like this will be a journey I will continue to be on throughout my whole life, but I hope that I will continue to progress and make steps towards happiness and peace.


‎"It's not anyone's job to make you happy nor even to support you. Being happy is definitely a do-it-yourself project and support is earned, not an obligation. Forget this and you'll have no one to share your unhappiness with."

"No one saves us but ourselves. No one can and no one may. We ourselves must walk the path to peace." Mahatma Buddha

I love you all!